2024

 Salam Alayk, 


Feels like it’s been a long time since I did not write or post anything in my blog last year. This year, I will be actively posting and updating my life here, all the progress, or my monolog, anything that I want to keep or share, I will try to post it here. It might not be for everyone to read it, but for those who read my blog, thank you! I hope you gais will always being blessed. 

Just for your information, I was writing this post while I am crying at 3.06am on 7th of January. I feel hurts, but I don’t know how to describe. What makes me more sad is, to think that it just a beginning of my new year, but why all this happened. To be honest, by the time I have tried to stop on asking why all this and that keep happening to me, is it hard to just respect my feelings and show me some concern. It hurts, but even the words can’t describe why and it’s harder to explain and even harder to ask someone who we trust to understand us. Sometimes, it’s better to keep it by ourself. 

This 2024 is really a special year to me because I’m turning into a new number to my new age. I wish nothing but May Allah ease everything for me, i want to focus on my family, people who always being there for me, my pets, and myself. First lesson I learn in 2024, ppl didn’t change even you keep telling them that they are hurting you, but they’re clueless. Their ignorance teach me that even the closest to us, can’t help you. They just did what they think it’s correct for them, but they ignore you, your feeling just by doing things that absolutely will hurt you.

Some things, it’s hard to explain to ppl, but when they said it hurts them. Believe me, it’s hurting them. And when you can’t help yourself to do as what you want on like, know that we can’t stop them except for try to accept their attitude and forgive them for doing that, and forgive yourself for letting them to keep hurting you. 

We are the one who allows people to hurt ourself, May Allah blessed us with a good and big heart. Allahumma Barik. 

Sincerely,

nfz


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